Can we just…

pause time quick?

There’s two weeks left in the semester and there is so much in the air and I may be having a panic attack because every time I think about it my chest gets tight and I get light headed and I just want to hide in bed and hold onto L because she’s the only thing that makes the world make sense and calm lately. But I can’t have her because we’re both way too busy and our schedules aren’t lining up well and even though I just spent all weekend with her, I could hardly touch her or kiss her because her family was around and we were sleeping on couches which wouldn’t support the both of us and so we were limited to sneaking kisses in the kitchen and cuddling for a half hour before going to our separate couches to sleep.

Noah & Rossi

NOAH (VOICEOVER)

I woke up one morning and she was gone. I checked the bathroom cabinet, the kitchen for her favorite coffee mug, the bedroom for her clothes. There was nothing left. As this sinking feeling was hitting me, I spotted her coffee cup sitting on a piece of paper, words scratched out underneath. There were coffee stains and scribbles, but the worst part was she had only written four words

                  

“You Hold Me Down

                  

-D”

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Fat is a fucking ninja, everyone.

Freshman year I stole a pair of my (bitch of a) roommate’s jeans, because mine were still wet from the crappy dryers and I needed to go somewhere. They fit like a glove, and after wearing them a few hours, even got loose.

A year later, I could hardly button them this afternoon.

This is my ah-ha moment. I have put on at least ten pounds in the last year. And no, that doesn’t seem like a lot of weight if we are talking about the bigger (no pun intended) picture of “over-weight”. But as a kid, I was alwaysoverweight at 135. I don’t know what skinny feels like, and that’s okay. I love my curves. But when they went from hourglass to pear, it was a sneak attack.

Fat is a fucking ninja, everyone.

That’s exactly what it is. Solid body fat. And that’s worse than just gaining ten pounds and being “firm” as some women are, or having “muscle fat”. No. Mine is justextra.

There are a lot of ways to diet, exercise, and an endless supply of magazine articles telling you how to “lose five pounds this week!”. I’m not sure which ones to try, or which ones work, but I need to start somewhere.

I am not doing this to please you. I am not doing this to please men, or women, or because my roommate looks better in a bikini than I do. I am doing this because I no longer feel comfortable in my own skin, and I am the only one who can do something about it.

I am going to get my curves back, and own the shit out of them again, all the while journaling my progress on tumblr, maybe even youtube if I get daring enough. And I want your suggestions, support, and criticisms.

Aerial Promenade (Jan 7, 2008)

Go live your life. Don’t waste it. What’s the point in holding back or being pessimistic about anything? Really! Where does it get you in the end?
Love yourself. Love others. Love everyone. Love everything!
Listen to this and you might get what I’m talking about:
Seagull Orchestra.
If you don’t, that’s okay because I’ll interpret it for you.
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL!
There is hope. There is beauty in your dark corners and cobwebs, and in those dead trees of winter. It’s everywhere. Inspiration and love is everywhere, if you look for it.
So stop sitting and waiting for it to find you! Get out there and grab it!
Forgive, don’t forget. Give more than one chance. Take risks, jump feet first, love with all your heart, give all you have, laugh every day, enjoy every moment, savor every person you come into contact with.
If you’re not going to do it because I told you to, do it for yourself.
Live your life with a passion and don’t give it up for anyone.


“…I have a little secret for ya. Huddle up. Huddle up! We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. Medicine, law, business, engineering, these are all noble pursuits, and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for…”
-Mr. Keating, Dead Poet’s Society

2164 /
fuckyeahstudentaffairs:

transtheorist:

lovingthebeautifulyou:

The stigma keeps us silent. The stigma further injures us. Stick together, be strong, and don’t be afraid to be vocal.

This! Talking about my mental health issues has helped me tremendously in accepting myself and learning to live with the way my mind and my emotions work. This isn’t to say everyone ought to do this of course, it’s just been a big positive step for me to talk a little about what’s going on with my mental health

We had a great discussion in my Law class, during which time someone said that they wouldn’t want someone on medication for mental health issues working at a university. I immediately spoke up and said that was completely unfair; anyone could snap at any time, and just because someone is on medication or has a history of mental health problems doesn’t mean that other people don’t have hidden issues or the potential for turning on their community. I said that if a history of depression meant someone couldn’t work in a helping field, then I should go and find something else to do.
Another classmate whispered to me that she wouldn’t be able to work in a helping field either, and that she almost forgot to take her meds that morning.
We need to be more open to talking about mental health issues AND realizing that they don’t automatically make people dangerous and unable to function in helping fields like student affairs and counseling.

Reconsidering my idea of a second date with this guy based on his kissing style.

I feel like an ass about this. Can someone back me up? A person’s smell, taste, or kissing style can really affect your perception of or relationship with them correct?

Bucket List

Beginning 2/22/12

  1. Live in a cottage in England
  2. Impact society around me
  3. Keep reminding myself what’s important to me
  4. Act on what I believe in
  5. Get married
  6. Have children
  7. Teach
  8. Challenge myself
  9. Travel, every opportunity I get
  10. Surround myself with good people, who question themselves and the world around them
  11. Never stop asking questions
  12. Learn guitar
  13. Sing for an audience
  14. More concert photography
  15. Get accepted into the Art Education major
  16. Finish my screenplay (Noah + Rossi)
  17. Have my own studio space
  18. Drive in/own a muscle car
  19. Never stop making art/writing
  20. Fall in love. As many times as I want/need
  21. Make mistakes
  22. Take risks
  23. Start a compost or food recycling project on campus
  24. Increase the recycling capacity on campus
  25. Attend Swing Dancing regularly
  26. Get involved with the art student organizations on campus
  27. Become more self-confidant; apply for scholarships and art shows
  28. Attend art shows, galleries, museums
  29. Get more tattoos
  30. Pay off my student debt
  31. Attend a Dave Matthews Band concert
  32. Sell art/crafts online


  33.                                To always be continued…
So true.
THEME.